Breaking My Long Distance Phobia

© Bernardo Baldiviezo 2011

I’ve always believed that long distance relationships don’t work. Not that I’ve had any experience and my views are completely unfounded, but somehow I believed it was a one way street to hurtville. I mean, how can you develop any kind of relationship when you’re not actually living in close enough proximity to see one another face to face, and more importantly, body to body? It has all the requirements to go straight down the drain once the initial honeymoon months fade, and as your wandering eye starts to flit to other fine specimens of the male form, what’s there to stop you from bed bouncing whilst your lover overseas has no idea? So strong in my belief was I that I actually, and very bluntly, said to Mr Toronto even before we met that I wasn’t willing to commit to a long distance relationship and I didn’t know if we should even entertain the idea of dating because where could it go? Oh, how wrong I was.

Long distance relationships seems like they could be a modern thing. With travel allowing people to journey and explore the world like never before, it’s more than likely that you’re going to fall in love with a suave and mysterious man from overseas. The wonders of Skype, Whatsapp and the Internet allow you to have a pretty fulfilling relationship, and with the ease of travel it’s not hard to fly here, there, and everywhere in seeking your love. And, for Mr Toronto, being an air steward certainly helps in terms of both being able to travel and having an entirely different concept of distance; I mean, a trip across the pond is all in a days work for him and he doesn’t think anything of it.

But the long distance thing isn’t a modern concept, it’s just easier to maintain in the 21st century. Yes, next generation transport has made the world a smaller place, but you can look at it the other way too that, as you got back in time, distance is all relative to the speed and ease of the transport you have. I’m sure Elizabeth Bennet felt that Longbourn was a million miles away. And she couldn’t pop onto Skype either to enjoy a quick interweb chat with Darcy’s gorgeous face. Think of wars too, where men were sent away, often for months and years, yet they managed to maintain their love affairs; distance really does make the heart grow fonder.

So, having now entered into a long distance relationship, I can truly say that my mind has been changed. In fact, for a hermit like me, having my space but being able to text, chat and call my beau is a God send. Of course, I miss him and think of a time when we can be together, but having the distance maintains the spark and freshness for the entire thing. And for the hermits, Pan Am’s and Mr Toronto’s of this world, a long distance love affair should not be discounted at first glance as it could be the start of something great.


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