A Bar to Avoid – LVPO

Being in Soho, one of London’s trendiest spots and the centre for the gay community, you would think that you couldn’t go far wrong as a bar. The pink pound is most definitely flowing here and so bars have to stay ahead to keep custom. However, whilst this bar wasn’t a gay bar, LVPO seemed to have missed the memo about being trendy and chic, and was probably one of the worst bars I’ve ever had the unfortunate circumstances to visit.

The night was great, due to being with friends and the venue’s one and only good point; great music. However, you’ll only be able to enjoy this if the overpowering smell of sick doesn’t knock you unconscious. Combined with a lack of air-con and the over zealous security keeping every window and door shut, you’ll deserve a medal if u don’t wretch at least once.

But the negatives don’t stop here. It’s a thriving Saturday night, we’re at a private function, and they’ve only laid on one barmaid. Sure, she’s pretty, she’s smiley but she doesn’t have a clue and, having ordered three cocktails, she disappears for at least 15minutes. Oh…and there is no cucumber, even though it’s an ingredient listed in half of their cocktails. Oh, and they’ve run out of glasses so you’re now sipping your £9 miniature cosmo out of a wine glass. Whilst the dopey barmaid was quickly replaced the new smiley girl behind the counter couldn’t understand a word so you had to point at the menu. And she plopped my beer on the bar so that it splashed out all over my shirt – seriously not cool.

If you don’t think this is bad enough, then head to the toilets where you’ll find the cloakroom next to the urinal. I don’t mean in a different room, I mean you have to reach over a pee infested grotty splashed toilet to put your coat in. Nice.

So, if u want a hot, overpriced grot-hole which smells of sick, this place is perfect. If you’d prefer going home without your coat having been splashed in drunken fuelled piss, best to avoid at all costs.


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